thisiskylie

After

Surprisingly, I felt pretty damn good immediately after the birth.  I wasn't sore, I could walk without any problems, I wasn't horrendously tired.  I was really floating on cloud nine.

The maternity wing was seriously over-stretched at that moment.  I had waited two hours for the delivery room, and typically there weren't any post-delivery rooms available. 

So, for the next 12 hours, Sophie and I hung out in the delivery room.  She pretty much breastfed continuously for the first three to four hours after birth, and then slept for nine hours straight.

I really liked the midwife unit (as much as you can like a hospital). It was relatively quiet, the midwives were all wonderful, there wasn't a plethora of noisy, beepy equipment in the rooms or being trundled around the corridors.

However, the beds were dire. They are made for labouring women, not resting ones. As much as I wanted to sleep, I just couldn't on that bed. It was in two pieces, it was covered in a thick rubber top sheet, it was way short.  So we waited and waited and waited until we finally got the all clear to go home at about 6pm.

Some random birthing bits:

Sophie was born to the sweet sounds of Ludovico Einaudi's I Giorni album, which was playing on my iPhone throughout the labour.  Random midwives were coming into the room just to ask about the music.  Now, I can't hear any of his songs without welling up.  It's lovely that Sophie has such a beautiful soundtrack.

I thought that being in the midwife-led unit meant that there wouldn't be any monitoring.  For the birth of Isabella, I was in the doctor unit and strapped to a baby heart monitor the entire time.  However, the midwife frequently used a doppler to find the fetal heartbeat and make sure all was ok.   I really have to feel for her, because she manouvered herself into all sorts of positions to get that reading, coz even if I wanted to move, half the time I couldn't (plus, I wasn't straying far from the gas and air mask!).

Hopefully this won't sound weird, but I was really alert after the birth this time, so had a look at the placenta when it came out. That is some alien shiz. And surprisingly quite large.

Birthing balls, for me, were a complete waste of time. However, it was quite good for the husband to sit on every now and then.

The husband also tried the gas and air, but woe, it made him feel really sick and he had to sit down. I had no sympathy whatsoever.

Continued

From the previous post, only six months behind schedule, and sadly, that ain't my latest deadline...

So, continuing from where I left off, contractions finally started four days late at 7am on Saturday morning:

**slightly graphic bits coming up**

After learning my lesson the last time, I took it real easy this time.  The in-laws came over to help out with some diy work around our house.  I took an afternoon nap.  The contractions continued throughout the day at a slow and steady pace, but they weren't in any way disabling or uncomfortable.

By 11pm, I was fed up and decided I'd been taking it way too easy.  The more I relaxed, the more the contractions slowed down and near enough petered out.  Any activity, and they'd start up again.  By this time, all in the house were asleep.

I decided to walk to try and bring on some stronger contractions and get this labour moving. So I walked round and round the bedroom, back and forth, back and forth, until 1am when the contractions suddenly came on hard and fast.

Quick call to the hospital, and off we went.

We arrived just after 1am. The hospital was full, so I had to wait in the waiting area for 2 hours!  While in labour!  There was nothing warm and fuzzy or private and comfortable in the waiting room. The lights were dimmed, there were a couple of hard blue plastic cafeteria chairs and that was it.  There was another lady in labour waiting too, and our contractions pretty much matched.

For the first hour, both of us suffered in silence, but by the second hour, the contractions had control of both of us and we were huffing and puffing and howling a bit. I was seriously uncomfortable. It was a race to see who bagged the toilet every five minutes as the pressure on our bladders was strong.

Each time an orderly or nurse came through the waiting room, we literally became stock still hoping that this was the moment we could move to the delivery ward.

Finally, after two hours, at 3am, the other girl got a spot in the midwife-led unit.  Happily for me, sadly for her, she came back two minutes later and I got the place instead. She had had a previous C-section so wasn't able to go to the midwife only unit. I have no idea how long she ended up waiting for a spot, and I really felt for her having to walk back into that waiting room.

First thing I did when I got to the delivery room, was find the gas-and-air and take the biggest, hugest lungful I could.

For the next hour and a half, the contractions came faster and faster, although nothing really seemed to be moving on. My waters still hadn't broken.  I wasn't in huge amounts of pain thanks to the gas and air (I want some in my home! Like tapwater!) but I was tiring, so got the midwife to break my waters.

She got right in there with her crochet hook and pierced the membrane, and that's when it really all started happening.  From that point on, it only felt like minutes to me, but apparently it was about 30 minutes or so.

The minute my waters broke, I felt the baby drop immediately, and the contractions became relentless.  I think it's very easy to focus on getting through the contractions and pain and overlook what you're body is trying to tell you and finally I realised that I needed to push.

At this point, things got terribly tribal.  It's not like I was on my knees on the jungle floor, and not to get too graphic, but the comfortablest place for me was sitting up on the bed. In fact, I think I was pretty much perched right on the edge of the bed, since it had been an absolutely huge effort to move anywhere after my waters broke. I made it to the edge of the bed and that's where I stayed.

The midwife got a colleague in to check on things as she was concerned that the baby was coming out breech.  But it turned out that her arms were up by her head so there was a lot of baby to get out in the first push.

So, three hours after arriving, and after a lot of long, low guttural noises (was that really me?), my beautiful daughter came into the world, all soft and red and sweet.  At 8lb 4 oz, she was 2oz heavier than her sister, and the absolute spitting image too.

Bonny and blithe

Now that I'm a Mum, one of the things that I crave are stories from my Mum about her early days as a Mum.  Did she breastfeed?  Did we sleep through the night?  Did she have much help? etc.  And, as it goes, these early days often get forgotten or overtaken by the truckload of memories that build up over the years.  So, I'm writing most of this stuff so that one day, when my daughters are grown (hopefully a LOT grown, like over 25), and are having families of their own, they can look back on this and see what is was like for us.

This one is for Sophie.

You were born on a Sunday, and the story goes that this makes you bonny and blithe, and good and gay; and so far, at just seven weeks old, it is true.  You were about a week overdue.  I'm pretty sure that, like your sister is pretty much a honeymoon baby, you are a Valentine baby.  Once we decided that it was time to try for another baby, we got pregnant with you straight away.  We've been so lucky with that.  And, like your sister, the pregnancy was a breeze.  No morning sickness or unusual cravings; it was life as usual just with an ever-expanding girth and an exciting date marked in our calendar.  There were two times for concern - you had to have your 12 week scan redone as the hospital was worried that you were measuring too small (I think it was all the stress with Coco dying and giving up my job).  And towards the end, I had protein in my urine, but everything was fine.  Other than that, you were spot on with your measurements throughout the rest of the pregnancy - at 20 weeks, the belly measured 20cm; at 38 weeks it measured 38 cm, etc.  This is one of those amazing facts of mother nature.  You moved a lot, at all times of the day, and your kick was ferocious.  My ribs are still recovering.  You also got the hiccups a lot - typically the minute I decided to go to bed. 

I was fairly sure that you were so comfy in your warm little womb that you would only come out under pressure; I definitely did not want to be induced again.  And, I needed you to come early or on time, as your Dad had back surgery and your Grandma had come over to help, but only for a limited time.  At two days overdue, I tried acupuncture to bring on the labour.  I had a few pains, but another two days passed before I convinced the midwife to do a sweep - she was extremely thorough, and it was extremely uncomfortable.  But, it must have worked, because a day later, the contractions started, at about 7am on the Saturday morning.

More later, feeding time at the zoo is about to commence.

Happy New Year

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

Sadly, attended a funeral.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

My resolution was: to put stuff that happens here, in this blog.  Considering that the last post was in June, six months ago, I think that's a big FAIL.

The last few years have involved a lot of plans and pressure and busy-ness; so for 2009 I just want to relax and enjoy life for a bit.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Me!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Sadly, my Pop and our dear little dog, Coco.  Greatly missed.

5. What countries did you visit?

Australia, France and the US.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

A career. And some blue skies and sunshine.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

April 14 - the day Coco died.

May - our holiday to Australia, including our last days with Pop.

November 16 - birth of Sophie.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Giving birth, completely naturally; and breastfeeding past six weeks (and still going strong).

9. What was your biggest failure?

Career.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Gastro-enteritis over Easter.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Airfare to Australia.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

The in-laws, for their constant support and help.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Mine, for my lack of patience; and my husbands sister for continuing a stupid feud that upsets everybody.

14. Where did most of your money go?

House, house, house.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Holiday to Australia; the day we came back to the UK from the holiday and submitted visa applications to move back to Brisbane; my Dads visit; pregnancy and birth of Sophie; husbands back operation meaning his return to health and freedom from pain (also scary as well as exciting); my Mum's arrival for a holiday.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?

Here come the girls, by Sugababes.  My anthem with the daughters.

Also, anything from Ludovico Einaudi's I giorni album - it was playing on the iPhone throughout the labour with Sophie and will forever be a moving tribute to her birth.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier.
b) thinner or fatter? Same.
c) richer or poorer? Much poorer.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Travel. Enjoying time with just the three of us, pre-Sophie.  S-e-x.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Yelling. *sigh*

20. How did you spend Christmas?

At home, with family. Breastfeeding Sophie through a growth spurt for the entire day. Feasting on a lot of food.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?

Yes - Tilly and Sophie.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Grey's Anatomy; Entourage; Private Practice; and The Tudors.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

No. Hate's a pretty strong word. Possibly my ex-boss for some pretty threatening behaviour.

24. What was the best book you read?

"why beautiful people have more daughters" by Alan Miller and Satoshi Kanazawa.  I havent read all of it, but the title rocks enough.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Ludovico Einaudi for some beautiful, stirring music.

26. What did you want and get?

My husband to return to full health.

27. What did you want and not get?

More travel; some income.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

Made of Honor. It's actually a pretty pants, formulaic film, but it's listed more because I watched it with my Mum and sis at a Gold Class cinema during our holiday in Aus.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

35, and I have no idea what I did.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

An income.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

Maternity - so big and comfy and pretty damn ugly.

32. What kept you sane?

Coffee.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Henry Cavill, who plays Charles Brandon in The Tudors.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

The dire state of the NHS and lack of maternity services.  The fact that I have to pay £400 for a visa to stay in the UK, and have to send off all of our passports, yet it still takes more than 10 weeks (and still counting) with no response, and no way I can call the Home Office to find out about the progress of the application.

35. Who did you miss?

Coco. And family in Aus.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

Sophie.  And Mr G, a work colleague with some potentially brilliant business opportunities.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

Good health is the most important thing; and that we can get through anything if we pull together.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

 

Currently..

Currently, we:
- have the post-holiday blues after a superb six week holiday home to Brisbane, Australia
- are both unemployed (yikes)
- are enjoying having Isabella at home full-time again
- are dreadfully missing our beautiful Coco and my Pop who both died about the same time
- are preparing to sell our house
- and move to Australia for good in September
- to have baby v2 in early November.
Happy times.

Growing Up x 2

Two milestones in Isabella's life today:

She moved from her cot to her big girl bed, and is fast asleep as I type.  She was a bit concerned when we were dismantling her cot, but became very excited when she realised that she got a proper bed - with a duvet! - and spent the afternoon arranging and rearranging all her soft toys and pillows around her as she lay down and jumped and sat up and jumped and lay down etc.  We thought we might have to go in a couple of times to put her back in bed but so far, all is quiet.  We'll see what time she wakes up in the morning though!

We also bought her a booster seat for the car.  She's on the cusp of the minimum weight threshold, so I'm not sure if we should be using it yet, but she struggles so much with getting into her car seat these days, that we might try it for a short ride and see how it goes.  Her little friend, who is the same age and about the same weight and height, has been using a booster seat for over a month now, so it should be ok, and it will sure make things easier when we go home to Brisbane soon as we won't need to hire a big old car seat.

In other news, in spite of the frivolity above, we are still missing our little Coco A LOT.  We imagined her jumping on the bed with Isabella earlier today; we still see her little nose prints on our windows; and I can't bear to hoover the carpet and get rid of the small traces of her fur.  I know it will ease with time, but she was young, and full of beautiful character, so it will always be a very sad tragedy for this little family.

UPDATE:  She slept happily in her bed all night, and didn't wake until 8am.  She didn't even get out of bed when she woke up until we came in to get her.  Second night was very happy too, although she did fall out of bed at about 10pm; but she didn't get up until 9am!  And she's having her afternoon snooze in the big bed too.  So far, we haven't had to go in and put her back to bed once.  Our girl sure likes her sleep.

For Coco, RIP

We are truly devastated.  She was only three, and our first baby really, and our family is not the same anymore.  We love her and miss her.

The Easter Bunny lost our house

So, no, we didn't get a visit from the Easter Bunny this weekend.  Sadly, we did get visited alternately by freezing winds, snow, hail, thunder, rain and loads of grey, miserable cloud, as well as a pesky little virus called gastroenteritis.  It knocked Bella for a day, but had me living in the loo or collapsed on my bed for nearly three days, and I'm still recovering now.  Even the thought of easter eggs still makes me feel gross, and if you know me, then I am most defo sick.  Thankfully the grandparents helped out and looked after Bella for a day which brightened up the holiday for her a little bit.

Hope everyone had a happy and bouncy easter.

and my heart melted

In the car on Easter Monday, we hear a little voice pipe up from the back:

"Daddy is my favourite."

pause

"I love my Daddy".

Awwwww.

My morning. Otherwise known as 'What can go wrong, will'

Off to Leeds for a business meeting.  Train leaves from Kings Cross, which is normally a one hour journey from home.  A little bit of wind and rain however, seems to leave London in chaos.  Nearly two hours later and two fainting ladies, I finally got to the station.  The trains were an absolute nightmare.  Overcrowded to the extent that, on two different trains, two different young ladies fainted right at my feet.  To the extent that the station I needed was closed due to overcrowding.

I finally got to Kings Cross, much in need of my early morning coffee.  Alas I had no cash.  The line for the cash machine was 50 people deep.  After eight years, I'm still not used to the numbers of people in London.  The largest queue in BrisVegas was for a showbag at the Ekka, and (in my day) even that was only 5 or 10 deep, not 50.

Since I got to the station so late, my train was just about to leave, so I couldn't hang around waiting to get cash.  I couldn't pay for my coffee with my card.  I stomped onto the train and found my seat, squished in next to the largest man on the train, and had a mild tanty.  I then promptly moved and discovered the one saving grace of living in a fast paced country - the train has free wireless internet access!  Doesn't take much to improve my mood and make me happy.  Off to read Perez now, byeeee.